Personally i think you are mistakenly on the wrong website. Wait But Why (July 7, 2015), Copyright © 2015 by Tim Urban, waitbutwhy.com. ), etc. But whatever. You invariably end up two or three hours late with one or both doses. I have to keep "the peace" because these people are in laws. If that make me selfish, probably. Reframing that early time as something valuable makes you feel like your time is being used constructively, whether for your own or for someone else’s benefit. You can't play on your phone while you wait? Punctuality is one of the crucial aspects of maximizing operational productivity in any industry. The truth is that there are many reasons why people just can’t get somewhere on time. Why Are Some People Always Late? Emotionally mature people discuss any problems they're having openly and directly (and respectfully) with each other, but immature, narcissistic, passive-aggressive types prefer to show their hostility covertly, or indirectly, such as being late particularly when it's clearly important to your friend (or your boss, your spouse, whatever) for you to be on time. I would guess that most people would agree the tenor of that poster was hardly either or the above. Find more ways to say late, along with related words, antonyms and example phrases at Thesaurus.com, the world's most trusted free thesaurus. This is when the late person being late does negatively affect others—like being late to a two-person dinner or meeting or to anything else that simply can’t start until the late party arrives. The people that I know~have known~to be habitually late are nothing more that self important. I just want to defend these people who you're offending for no reason. Fortunately, with age, I've realised if you simply stop apologising, others learn to put up with your lateness, as they should have done to begin with. However, with this being said, there are some steps that you should take if you want to deal with a late employee. Don’t excuse the CLIPs in your life—it’s not OK, and they need to fix it—but remember, it’s not about you. And thanks for providing examples of your passive-aggressive mind-set. No matter how many times the CLIP has done a certain activity, what he or she remembers is that one time when things went the quickest. Most of us know people who are always on time because they hate being late. I fall into this category; in fact, I’m paranoid about being tardy. have a good life. Told her that was a poor excuse. If you have married a narcissistic bully who demands that you arrive to all events either 45 minutes early OR 45 minutes late, (both of which are just plain rude and domineering/ controlling and narcissistic) Being constantly late, time and time again, is just plain rude, it's saying 'my time is more important than yours', it's disrespectful, insulting and selfish. Every event I am expected to sit and wait 45 minutes! The point, again, is that being on time is thoughtful, polite, and respectful of the needs and feelings of others, and being chronically extremely late or chronically extremely early is just weird, even rude (if it's a formal dinner or party event in someone's home) and rather passive-aggressive or covertly hostile. Demanding that someone be early can be just as rude. It is, of course, impossible to arrive on time each and every time. Sometimes. She's a social worker and she's always late. Being late to a date, whether it is a romantic date or a meeting with a friend, is another of distressing dreams. Nothing’s better than the headline “The Reason People Are [bad quality that describes you] Is Actually Because They’re [good quality].” I got to reading. You are wrong. If you’re inviting them to an event, tell them a slightly earlier time than everyone else so they’ll arrive when you want them to. A reliable identifier of CLIPs is a bizarre compulsion to defeat themselves—some deep inner drive to inexplicably miss the beginning of movies, endure psychotic stress while running to catch the train, crush their own reputations at work, etc. You chose to rely on a car :). There nothing wrong with being narcissistic and be proud of who you are and what you do. If someone you care about is pulling rank by always running late, lead by sharing your own feelings in a supportive way. If they have a problem with it, let them come help you LOL. And just to show you how narcissistic i am i wont even bother to read your reply cuz i don't care. I don't know where you live, probably somewhere where you have 3 streets so you are never late anywhere. So, I started giving myself almost 4 hours to go places. Why Losing Weight May Be Harder for Night Owls, Are You Excellent at Running a Meeting? For me, it’s some mix of these three odd traits: I’m Late Because I’m in Denial About How Time Works. Update: 3 out of 5 days late like this, but never more than 10 minutes late in either case. Learn more at AdoreeDurayappah.com. Ever heard of "fashionably late"? It can be frustrating and inconvenient when someone is always late, but there are ways to deal with them. Intriguing. In a matter of fact i am always on time, never late, but never early. share. Why is their time more valuable than mine? Being five minutes late or leaving five minutes early can develop into a chronic issue that costs thousands of dollars a year even in the case of entry-level employees. So really, just relax already. I can't stand it. Bella Wolffe. Get a life. Doesn't matter the time nor the occasion. If you're trying to motivate someone else to stop being chronically late, remember that while Benjamin Franklin espoused the virtues of being early to bed and early to rise, there have always been others who agree instead with Franklin D. Roosevelt, who said: “I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm.”. Now you see, i like to keep people like you waiting for me, just because I know they would be pissed. If you have married a narcissistic bully who demands that you arrive to all events either 45 minutes early (OR 45 minutes late, both of which are just plain rude and domineering/ controlling and narcissistic) then it's on YOU to put your foot down and reach a compromise with your bully of a husband, such as agreeing to be ten minutes early (or on time) from now on. And Anonymous A, you strike me as the most narcissistic person in this whole forum. If for some reason we must start at 7:30, he shows up at 7:35. what would be some causes and what should we do with him? How late? Answer Save. That signifies an inability to enjoy the moment.”. I don’t think there’s anything that will get me to internalize that packing for a weeklong trip takes 20 minutes. I far more care about the quality tha quantity. Things just happened, like an accident right in front of me, my pipes bursting just as I was about to walk out the door, TWO buses not showing up, etc. I never saidthat iiam chronically late. Thank you for confirming that I have presented the better argument; that is after all the point of a debate: to present a more accurate, convincing or persuasive argument. That leaves us with the problem of motivation: How can an anti-early bird just bite the bullet and risk being early to be on time? Buti always there before everyone. Within a couple of weeks she stopped teaching the class. I know lots of busy individuals who work and have kids of various ages, and a couple of these friends have special needs children, and yet somehow these friends are rarely if ever late, and on the rare occasions they are late they let the rest of us know (so as not to hold up the dinner or the departure or whatever) AND they apologize for being late. People are late because they don’t want to be early. And it certainly doesn’t mean you just “like to stop and smell the roses.” Let’s call it what it is: if you’re routinely late, you are rude and inconsiderate. Though desperately wanting to break the habit, the conflicting motivation to not be late or early poses a real problem. Unlike you. Until 4 years ago, I was late for EVERYTHING, even if I gave myself EXTRA TIME. Narcissists are loathe to acknowledge that *everyone's* time is important and valuable to them: just exactly as important and valuable as your own time is to you. Own it: own your narcissism; at least be honest if you can't be caring and empathetic. It might help to have a frank and honest discussion with the individual about their passive-aggressive way of showing their hostility towards you and clear the air. If those four well-paid employees arrived 15 minutes before Weill got to the meeting, that still would have cost the company $4,250 in wasted time. The question is 'why?'" In addition to that, we have 2 leagues of basketball, 2 leagues of cheerleading, karate, voice lessons, and 3 nights of ballet and gymnastics in another city. If you are ignored within more intimate circles, such as family and friends, you may feel like you have done something wrong. There are various reasons. I am married to someone who demands I be chronically early. So, it seems to me that you have a problem taking orders or simply being cooperative when someone else needs you to do things their way. Simply put, they’re fundamentally hopeful.”, “People who are habitually late don’t sweat the small stuff; they concentrate on the big picture and see the future as full of infinite possibilities.”, “People with a tendency for tardiness like to stop and smell the roses … Life was never meant to be planned down to the last detail. In general terms, is appears as though people who are late are narcissistic and those who are early are conscientious. 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